“Love many things, for therein lies the true strength, and whosoever loves much performs much, and can accomplish much, and what is done in love is done well.”
Vincent Van Gogh
It was a very, very long time ago. I remember quite well, when I had no other chance but to make life choices. So I did. I was 10, I lost my mother, and immediately my whole world collapsed… She had been carrying it on her shoulders like a female Atlas. As the only and silent witness, I saw the crushing down and consequently the shards all over… I should have shone a light into the dust, but that was after I had gone much more into the darkness.
In a similar way to several Greek tragedies, the particular mistake in my wider family was to ignore the identity of a blood relative. This disregard included selfishness, and as a matter of fact, a bit of stupidity, but most of all… lovelessness.
In hindsight, I have always known what I now can confirm. There are only two ways, with or without love. Nevertheless, I kept my secret knowledge under seven keys, so scared of being hurt. So underestimated is to have emotions and feelings. Imagine if we finally discovered that we are just like animals… only they are not pretending to be what they aren’t… But, we have a mind, for what without a soul?
I survived from the abandonment. I was on my own. I drifted through the circumstances when what I really wanted is to open the seas. I needed to unlock the seven gates and liberate the energy blocked within. I reached out for help and was told to stop and breathe. I had to coach my heart in order to overcome what I feared most. I trained my mind to focus on love, on my self-esteem, on my inner power. Because I had the right to have aspirations no matter what they said. I refused to go with the flow, if I didn´t trust where it went. When there were dark clouds ahead, I always preferred to believe there was a bright sun shining beyond those clouds… I’m safe now. I have a lovely family. I can close my eyes and feel the eternity.
From the bottom of my heart, I strive to achieve my dreams. Or is it only the act of resigning from our dreams that makes us part of the new generation? Life is all about playing… You can’t take it too seriously… But you will never know your limits unless you push yourself to them. Imagine what you need to create, and feel it. Imagination creates reality. There is no possible way to perceive, that which is done well, without a tender outlook. There is no genius without soul. There is no soul without love. The power of love is the intelligence of the Universe. If you can’t feel it, you can’t see it.
So, being practical, in order to develop a practice, it’s relieving to become someone else. I find pleasure in disconnecting from myself and connect to something spiritual, leaving behind my ego and being physically so present, that nothing else matters, so involved in the present moment. This is what I love about acting. Allowing myself to connect to the source.
It’s such a trip to look through the window. Because I work on the abstract, I paint on the unseen… the colors, lights and shadows, my blends belong to the untouchable world. I’m absolutely passionate about looking at the sky.
It hurts so much not to try… Loyalty is to our own spirit. Our essence is a fractal, and has the same character as the whole, as the Universal essence. To deny it, is equal to deny the existence of the galaxy. We are part of the creation. We are a miracle.
If there were other Vincent Van Gogh’s living in the present time, and no doubt there are, what kind of opportunities would we offer them? If that were to happen, would we ignore them once again? Or have we as a humanity evolved enough as to be able to show them love and appreciation? I’d like to think there is a place for us to live in the synchronicity of love.
In special gratitude to all my predecessors, those who led the way and passed through the seas.